Not too long ago, I wrote a post about this viral Reddit thread where women shared the things they’re sick and tired of seeing in men’s dating profiles and bios. Soon after it was published, the post was flooded with even more responses from the BuzzFeed Community. So, without further ado, here are even more dating app bios from men that are an immediate swipe left:
“I’ll fall for you, if you trip me.”
“The phrase ‘Let me guess,’ and then they proceed to name a bunch of stuff that’s supposedly on my profile. Dude, just read all of what I actually wrote on mine and you won’t need to guess.”
“‘Please know how to hold a conversation.’ Fine, I expect the same courtesy, though.”
“I hate ‘I’m overly competitive about EVERYTHING.’ To me, that just screams, ‘I’m insecure!'”
Putting down women in their profile, like, “If you don’t look like your pics, first drink is on you.”
“Any profile that’s a list of what THEY want without any mention of why *I* might be interested in THEM. I see lots of profiles where a guy’s wish list describes me exactly and I’m like, ‘Too bad he’ll never know, because I have no reason to swipe right.'”
“‘Open to a long-term relationship with the right person.’ It sounds reasonable on the surface, but…NO ONE wants to get into a relationship with the wrong person, so this screams, ‘I’m not really looking for long-term, but I don’t want to say that, so I’m being intentionally vague in case we meet and you might want to hook up.'”
“I’m 6 ft 7 in…those are two different measurements.”
“I’m a bit tired of ‘if my dog likes you, so will I.’ As someone who has been bitten in the face and arm by a dog, dogs freak me out a bit. I’m tired of the assumption that everyone wants or is comfortable around a dog. Also, having a dog is also not an entire personality trait. You’ll have to tell me a bit about yourself, not just post pictures of your dog and hope that works.”
“Complaining about other women on the app as if they’re entitled to be attracted to every woman on there. Just swipe left like the rest of us, bro.”
“‘Extra points if you (insert activity/quality).’ It’s so degrading to think we’re getting points or being graded for being ourselves. Bye.”
“If someone’s profile mentions that they ‘don’t want any drama,’ THEY are always the drama.”
“‘I’m looking for open-minded people’ is code for, ‘I’m just here to mess around and I don’t want to be called out on it.'”
“Usually, if a guy has ‘love a girl who can cook’ in his bio, it means either he can’t or won’t cook himself. It can also be a red flag that there may be other household chores he won’t do, but he’ll certainly expect his girlfriend to do them for him because those are ‘women’s work.’ Nothing more pathetic than a man who can’t make his own breakfast.”
“Anybody who has ‘two truths and a lie’ in their bio. They either like to lie and are letting you know, or they’re trying to gauge your gullibility/ability to recognize their lies, and the entirety of your time together will be spent trying to figure out what’s a lie and what’s the truth. Automatic swipe left.”
“I keep seeing more and more bios that only say, ‘Just ask!’ Why is the burden on me? You have a chance right here to tell me IN YOUR BIO literally anything about yourself to show if you’re someone I would want to talk to. It makes you look dull as hell.”
“I always swipe left on guys who say they’re ‘fluent in sarcasm.’ Sarcasm is not always high-brow humor. Most of the time, it’s being mean at someone else’s expense masquerading as a joke.
“I don’t usually swipe right, so if we match, you’re pretty lucky.”
“Any bios that include ‘devil’s advocate.'”
“Anything about loving tacos. Is this all men eat? Is it a euphemism? I have no idea, but I have seen it on SO many profiles.”
And finally, “‘If COVID doesn’t take you out, can I?'”
Submissions have been edited for length/clarity.
Okay, now let’s change it up! What are the things you LIKE seeing in men’s bios and profiles on dating apps? Share them in the comments!